Archive for the 'Banter' Category

Office dilemma

Thursday, October 1st, 2009

One of my colleagues never drinks coffee, however her fledgeling relationship is improving her coffee manufacturing abilities:
If I make a coffee for my boyfriend before work, he only ever takes a sip or two and I end up throwing the rest away.
Why don’t you only make half a mug?
That won’t work. Half a mug will [...]

Overwritten?

Sunday, June 21st, 2009

You appear to have missed the entire point, my darling. I was having way too much cliche’d fun. Let there be no adjective left unturned. I even went back to add a few more in, just for bad measure.
Overwritten.
Tsk.

On the advice of strangers

Tuesday, June 2nd, 2009

I needed new sunglasses and, if I’m heading to Milan in a heatwave, it was better sooner than later.
In the shop there was an enormous choice, but I am notoriously bad at choosing anything to suit me. The main reason I wear contact lenses is that I’ve never fully forgiven myself for the purple and [...]

Doctor knows best

Sunday, May 31st, 2009

TSD came into the kitchen as I was pouring coffee.
She was dressed in athletic looking gear and was wiring herself up to her iPod.
I offered her a coffee but she was heading off for a run. I looked out of the window to the sun streaming in, baking hot. I look at her fair, Scottish [...]

The next Top Shop model?

Monday, May 25th, 2009

My extra-tall housemate has found himself a new girlfriend.
We met her tonight. She is almost as tall as he is. She is really slim to go with it. Extremely so.
After they walked out of the kitchen together TSD turned to me:
‘So there are people that fit the Top Shop jeans, then. Who knew?’

Things I never expected to overhear #49

Monday, April 20th, 2009

On walking through a Newcastle park in April:
‘This place is just like Paris’.

On flirtation

Sunday, April 19th, 2009

One of my housemates is often a little bit cheeky, but has always been pretty shy with the ladies. I’m glad to say being in a blossoming relationship is doing him the world of good.
We’re cooking a house meal today, one where we team together to put a 4 course meal on the table.
He knocked [...]

On management material

Sunday, April 19th, 2009

We were going to an event in an outlying town, my colleagues and I. One of my colleagues brought a friend along for the ride. The trouble was we only had the name of a landmark. I tried looking it up on the web, but no maps nor descriptions of its location.
I drove to the [...]

Things I never expected to overhear #72

Thursday, March 26th, 2009

Nothing says I love you like a spam pizza.

The neverending wardrobe

Sunday, March 8th, 2009

One of the stylish young things almost ruined a pair of shoes yesterday, wading through Diet Coke. This morning she came to work in Wellington boots.
‘Ah, no shoe collection is complete without a pair of wellies’ I said.
She replied. ‘Honey. no shoe collection is *ever* complete’.

from the Dragon’s mouth